on having friends

Somebody once conveyed to me a saying which after more than a decade still lingers in my head:

THERE ARE TWO KINDS OF FRIENDS.
One is a FRIEND-FRIEND and the other is a TRUE FRIEND.

A friend-friend is a product of circumstances. Take away the circumstances and the essence of friendship is gone...

Arthur and I became friends because we were colleagues at work. We had no choice but to bond together because we belonged to the same department. Then, when the time came that he had to transfer to another workplace, the fire of friendship started to dwindle. I guess he was just a friend-friend. The circumstance that created the friendship was our work. Then, when his work was changed so did our friendship.

On the other hand,there is a true friend who is beyond circumstances and the essence never fades...

She was my classmate in the University. When I was in my third year, I got transferred to another class. I really had to blend in because most of the faces in the class were not really welcoming. Then , there was this girl classmate of mine who was kind enough to smile and she invited me to join this group of young counselors. Her invitation changed my life. We became really close. She was like an older loving sister (I want to laugh) to me. Initially, she had this not-so-good impression about me but time had its way for her to realize the good person that I was and I am.

After some years our communication became limited and for a decade, i never heard about her. I was not able to attend her wedding, I was not there during the baptism of her child, I was not really around for some years. Then, Facebook reconnected us. After the separation, it was still the same. Nothing has changed. We were still the good old buddies (as in literally old)that we were. I felt good knowing that she was A OK in her life. I started telling her about my life so far. With in between jokes and bullying, we rekindled the friendship that is so true. There is no doubt, she is a true friend of mine.

A FRIEND-FRIEND or A TRUE FRIEND?

This is how I usually assess my friends after some years of knowing them. I am happy that I have true friends more than the fingers in my hands, but I also have a number of friend-friends.